guess the show

A passionately opinionated, vaguely angry woman with a snazzy bob and a sensationalistic bent comments on news issues during her show on a major cable news network as if her opinions ("child rapists are bad," "beating your wife is bad," "kidnapping is bad") are somehow controversial.

guess the show

A group of misfit geeky kids and their living-vicariously adviser seek to make their activity club successful, much to the displeasure of a rival activity coach, eventually recruiting some less-misfit kids and featuring, every episode, some suspiciously-well-choreographed-and-arranged musical numbers.

guess the show

A super good looking early thirty-something dude who has never held down a job in his life, and his life-long best friend (an also super good looking dude) who is a pharmaceutical representative, start up a private psychic detective agency and help the police solve mysteries and catch killers. The first super good looking dude has been trained by his father (an ex-cop) to be hyper observant and he plays off that ability as psychic powers. The two friends quip non-stop, creating much hilarity, and often scream like small children at the sight of bodies, killers, mummies and spiders. There is a pineapple in every episode.

Also, Brunhilda may or may not have seen one of the actors around Seattle.

guess the show

Stupid, marginally-military-related annoying people investigate crimes that take place on or near or related to the sea (or something equally lame), usually exactly during the time you'd really prefer to be watching Law and Order: SVU.

guess the show

A woman famous more or less only for existing (and perhaps sullying her family name) hosts a competition centered around fake-tanned, trendily-dressed young adults without any sense of shame whatsoever competing to... be her best friend (?), based on the incredible success her previous BFFships have had (both in terms of actual friendship and lasting success and fame for the other party), including an ostensibly real one chronicled on a different reality TV show and a fake one on the prior season of this show and also her now-much-less-famous sibling, all of which did not seem to lead to lasting BFFship.

guess the show

A friendly neighborhood man in a cardigan introduces his viewers to the wonderful world behind the model train track as well as all kinds of adventures in their daily lives, such as the inner workings of the crayon factory, during which viewers feel secure and loved and like they're learning.

guess the show

In this sadly-no-longer-on-TV delight, a man (dude, perhaps, would be more appropriate) takes four ladies (also not an accurate descriptor, for the most part) on a multi-part "date" consisting of a mix of activities and gossip time, during which he winnows his group down to the one he "best connects with" through three evenly-spaced eliminations, even though the audience knows that by that he means "would rather take home after filming."

guess the show

A group of four urban dwellers marginally (if at all) more interesting or attractive than you or I goes about their daily business, which is probably not any more interesting than anyone else's, and nothing happens (funny or otherwise).

guess the show

The most boring person from a show about faux-drama, which itself focuses on a relatively boring character from a different show about faux-drama, gets her own show in a new big-city location, where she works a fake (or possibly "real") job, struggles to adjust to the fact that her coworker isn't her best friend anymore (and is actually a huge bitch), deals with her not-very-into-her Austrialian "boyfriend," and generally sucks interestingness from the screen as she says polite but uninteresting things and sidesteps all confrontation of any kind.

guess the show

An entitled, over-indulged teen too young to drive rants and raves for a half hour (or 20-ish minutes, with frequent commercial interruptions by Noxema) about her extremely important requirements in the automobile she can't legally drive yet, the dresses her friends are and aren't allowed to wear, the decor in whatever tacky and overpriced venue she's convinced her parents to rent for her, and the over-the-top and ridiculous "theme" of the event, despite the fact that in the real world no one that age still has theme parties (in the real world, that shit doesn't start back up until college), while her parents--who presumably caused her to become this hellion--pretend to be frustrated while also caving in to her every ever-more-insane whim.

guess the show

Guest stars include Will Arnett, Matthew Broderick, Carrie Fischer, Rip Torn, most of the cast of SNL, and Jennifer Aniston. Important plot points in season 2 include Sabor de Soledad, a gay bomb, diabetes repair, Teamster subs, backdoor bragging, and a porn video game. And if you're not watching it, I hate you.

guess the show

Rich, fake-breasted, leathery-skinned mothers and wives in a major city are taped being bitchy to each other, their husbands and their children. In one manifestation, all of the women look the same except for the brunette and in another version, all the women are black except one. The show features much crying, screaming and arguing over petty things.

guess the show

An aging rocker (who is desperately trying to hide that he is balding) invites 20 women into his home to compete for his affection. Some are strippers. Lots of platform heels, dyed hair/weaves, mini dresses, fake boobs and, of course, tramp stamps. There are dramatic elimination ceremonies in which women have crying exit interviews and always say "I just don't understand why he would do this to me." He eventually chooses one of the less skanky women only to return for another season eight months later.

guess the show

An infinitely quotable dysfunctional family is held together by a thread in the form of a reluctant middle brother, who's trapped by his ambitions to someday run the family business, which meanwhile is being investigated for light treason, and must keep together his untalented and occasionally offensive older brother, deluded and vain twin sister, sexually ambiguous never-nude brother in law (the world's first analrapist), infantile younger brother, and snotty unaware mother while his father flourishes in prison by selling successful religious videos.

guess the show

Stranded people on desert island dealing with ridiculously soapy relationships, the haunting effects of their lives before the accident, magnetic fields, polar bears!, holes in the ground, random numbers--that aren't so random?!--, crankiness, dirt in large supply, lots of (evidently unprotected) sex, all the people you like dying, a weird science experiment, and disgruntled fans who don't like the direction in which it's all headed.

guess the show

Someone, usually a woman or child, dies or goes missing. Then two dectives and their back-up (an angry Jew and the original "Cop Killa" (irony!)) go about trying to solve the case. There is sexual tension between the detectives even though the boy-cop has a ex-wife and 16 x 10^83 kids. They eventually go to court or have to consult with the new and annoying DA (I HATE HER). Each episode ends randomly and often without any closure.

guess the show

A jaundiced dysfunctional family have myriad adventures in a fictional town set in a notoriously unnamed US state, where they harass their Bible-loving next-door neighbors, frequent an apparently-unpopular dive bar, and cause no end of headaches to bosses and principals, all the while coining popular catchphrases and paying homage to every facet of pop culture you're not smart enough to understand allusions to.

guess the show

A cranky, deliberately unfriendly doctor solves ridiculously convoluted medical mysteries while his team of attractive and variously-emotionally-tormented assistants attempt to aide but end up awed by his abilities.

guess the show

I am going to give you a formula for a TV show
guess which one it is:


Every scene is an awkward interaction
It is set in a workplace
Only one male character is good looking
This phrase occurs "...put my stapler in Jell-O again"

GUESS!