laudable lyrics

"Never trust a big butt and a smile."

lessons I learned the hard way

28. There is no possible way to say no to seconds of stuffing, no matter how full you are.

random facts

Brunhilda isn't allowed to cook because she is busy eating clam dip

top 5 tuesday

reasons Thanksgiving is awesome

5. family, giving Thanks, etc.
4. turkey
3. gravy
2. stuffing
1. mashed potatoes

random facts

I am not allowed to help cook during Thanksgiving dinner.

signs of cultural implosion V

6-year-olds who carry purses, 185 dollars for a sweater vest at Macy's, The Real Housewives of Atlanta, that a real housewife of Atlanta bought her 11-year-old daughter two $13,000 purses, that purses could possibly sell for $13,000, that an 11 year old would know what the hell Louis Vuitton is, over Parent's Weekend at my school more boyfriends visited than parents, LOST season 5 hasn't started yet, that some people don't know whether Beliz is in South America, Asia, Africa or Europe, that the Onion world atlas is the only one we own, the fact that owning said atlas makes us the cultural elite, Madonna's face, that anyone drinks Mountain Dew for the flavor

things I thought were impossible

8. That I could wear a white sweater out and not spill a single thing on it.

favorite things

I am posting some favorite things too
for fun

Mini pumpkins, warm blankets, Polaroids, colors

hell yeah

favorite things

(Another new feature, in which we make like Oprah [Borpo?] and feature things we love.)

Calypso, paisley, Chinese checkers, sweater capes.

under-appreciated potential superpowers

time flexing

For when you need a couple of extra hours in the evening to grade a batch of papers and for when you'd like to speed up an interminable lecture. Equally beneficial! If you could treat time like a rubber band and stretch it or bunch it up as needed, you wouldn't have to bother with the real-life power of time management. Because that one is impossible.

cultural commentary

(From the New York Times review of Jimmy Buffett's A Salty Piece of Land, by Kinky Freedman, 28 November 2004)

"There is a fine line between fiction and nonfiction, and I believe Jimmy Buffett and I snorted it in 1976. The two of us are among the few musicians in the Western world who make a regular habit of writing prose, which may also explain why this newspaper decided upon me to review this book rather than, say, Philip Roth. Maybe it was God who selected me to review Buffett's book."

laudable lyrics

(A new BandtheCO feature in which we feature, what else, laudable lyrics.)

"Your body ain't Pamela Anderson; it's a struggle just to get you in the caravan.
But listen, baby girl: before I let you lose a pound, I'll buy a bigger car."

jobs I would not want

location scout: Ice Road Truckers

Just because if your job were scouting locations for the show Ice Road Truckers, you would be in an inhospitable, cold, miserable environment deciding if it were inhospitable, cold, and miserable enough to make for quality Discovery Channel programming. In Antarctica. On ice.

top 5 tuesday

Things to do instead of homework

5. Spend time with the cute boys downstairs
4. Eat a bagel
3. desperately attempt to reach 50,000 words for National Novel Writing Month
2. Facebook
1. Sleep


yeah...this is what I did today

lessons I learned the hard way

27. Coffee shops are only good places to NaNo until you discover that they have free WiFi. And you discover this.