things I care about more than what you're saying VI

How fast your phone connects to the internet, how good you are at Scrabble (because she's jealous), your digestive details, what college Hermione is going to, man-on-the-street opinions, the super cool new app you got for your iPhone, the color scheme of your apartment and how it helps purify your chi, the number of inches you lost thanks to DexaTrim, anything related to Casey Novak, Paris Hilton's new BFF, why the Real World Cancun cast members work at Hooters, the photos of you from that camping trip you went on last weekend, just how often you get manicures or pedicures, lies and the lying liars who tell them, that terrible and self-admittedly illegal home renovation show on HGTV that Melissa and her mom and I stumbled upon in a particularly desperate TV-watching hour, the exact shade of dye you use in your hair, random celebrities pubic hair groomic habits, internet forums set up for unusual interests like growing hair as long as possible, the chemical make up of nail polish, just how they figure out what trains go where and when, the different techniques for making reupholstering chairs and sofas, how you eat a sandwich.