Tuesday, March 24, 2009

things I care about more than what you're saying III

The requirements for getting into North Dakota State University, Merlin and the War of the Dragons, scarf-tying techniques, non-twine package tying products, how hot your calves look in your new heels, geography of ancient China, similarly-the geography of modern China, the super-hot girl/guy you met in the bar the other night but didn't exchange contact info with, your sexual fantasies if I am not in a sexual relationship with you, Freud, centripetal v. centrifugal motion, physics, smelting techniques, your mom's secret ingredients for mac and cheese, affected British accents, anecdotes from Kindergarten, dental hygiene, the occasional use of thee and thou in a movie, basket-weaving techniques, the many treatments for cold sores and/or yeast infections (and foot fungus), hypothetical breeds of dragon, what you would have "totally done better" if you were performing that floor routine/filming that movie/writing that novel even though you've never done any of those things well enough to be at a level other people would critique, anything related to accountancy.

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